but I ran away

so Bob, a friendly person with a mostly mortal body, but who has a skull instead of a head, chases after you.

but then the zombie nazis killed bob...again...

So with a spring in your step and a temporary delay to your inevitable demise you decided to march off in an entirely new direction ...

but trip and fall on your very first step...

So the sun melts ice cream into a sticky mesh.

But the mush still tastes really good...

So you lick it all up...

...but you are caught licking the ground...

...So you pretend you are praying towards Mecca...

but it works too well and you are hung in town square by intolerant people

...So you cut yourself free before imminent death and run away...

But I am captured by bandits

So you become a bandit

but im caught and thrown in jail!

So you are released on probation because in your country banditry is considered a non-violent offence

But a new supreme leader is 'elected' and changes this, retroactively making me a criminal and forcing me to become a fugitive!

So you incite a revolution against the new tyrant

But myself, my family and my lieutenants are 'disappeared' by Supreme Leader!

So I reappeared right in front of just to spite him

But he has protection from teleportation, so your body, mind and soul are each jettisoned into different locations in the Astral Plane.

So we begin the quest for reunification of the soul, which goes well with the help of Otis Redding (the "King of Soul").

But The Soul King turns out to have never died and is actually a Demilich waiting to capture wandering souls and litigate them for copyright infringement in the Court of the Astral Emperor, he captures you.

So the Soul Men obey the Soul King.

But the Soul Men are also the jury for the court case, so if the Soul King tells them to find you guilty, they will.