Re: Story vs(?) combat
Time basically. I took an hbour to write this, and then read Facemaker's post. He said it more politely and diplomaticly did and would have. I like D&D, unlike Facemaker. I love it in fact.
I'm still "there" I enjoy D&D combat, but it's not story. It's a game at that point of extra footage. It's just enjoying the combat for all its minutiae. It's like watching a movie frame by frame to enjoy cinematography and errors. It's fun, but it's not the main story. It's like watching the Matrix on 1/16 rate. It's basically an all day event to have an coherency, then also all night, most of the next day thing, and the fight scenes take an hour to finish and not much happens when you take a potty break, or get some food.
It's a subsect of film, people do do this, and likewise with gaming.
To some though, like Eggy, you need to have the chance the book/screen will close in any significant juncture, and when it does that...that's it. You rolled too many ones. Sorry. You lose, or at least never will get back.... The relationships, the hope you could have survived.
It's statistics, play long enough you'll have STRINGS of bad or awesome rolls. This is just numbers and randomness. You should not only prepare for 5 1's, but expect it it eventually. This is great for punishemtn and reward! It's not good for a set story. Many GMs have one in mind too, many player like to be on a ride.
It's very good for sandbox though. As for the big baddy dying, no plan can prevent FUBAR. Eventually if you rely on dice, they will fail you, guaranteed. Find a power that makes you immune to dice, then sure, fine, but that's a different fare of combat in most dice games.
All this (like Eggy's experience can be positive. Especially if you like gambling. It can feel more earned, even though your actions had no effect on the die eventually spiking into consecutive 1's, or 20's. This is psychologically substantiated. We know humans enjoy rewards where they think they had an impact, but in reality it was just pure chance. Far beit to deny someone a good experience, especially if the bad ones don't deter them.
Time basically/It's time and the dilatation of the minutiae. It's time you never get back IRL. It's investment into character, and character's relationships. Some people view combat as you do playing house. They don't have time for it. Simple as that. J.R.R Tolkien sort of felt this way. It's why combat was far different than how the movies portrayed combat. I liked the movies personally, I found Tolkien a bit too pedantic. He was fine with that though. He fathered the creation of contemporary fantasy language.
To some, I think it's also like taking a microscope to person face to take a cell by cell photograph for portrait. I mean yes, the mechanics (if perfect) could be good, but they never WILL be perfect. There IS NO perfect. It's vanilla, chocolate and tripe. Ice cream could have been tripe flavored one upon a time, true story.
EDit: As for "what the character would do" vs "can't die" nope, basically the same. lol. Most adventurers don't want to die, and in D&D? pfffft. Look, this ain't a world without resurrection. I'm baffled at people who don't take the smoke/food break/vacation when their character dies in D&D. That's absurd. People do though, yeah, I've seen it. It's like that 10 years song, "Falling is Flying". Work through the death, the story isn't over if you still show up.
As for story, SURE, there ways to lose and win. Without combat or without dice. I've won and lost in sessions where no combat occurred. Takes can be more than violence, they can be natural disaster, illness, and just justice systems. You can also lose by means of other grievous assaults that emotionally scar your character's loved ones. In fact THOSE losses sting more than anything. Sure, I killed rapist, but that doesn't change the crime. If I had been clued in that the guard my sister had hired was off, I wouldn't have let it happen. The GM gave clues, I just didn't catch them. I was distracted by the "big baddy" my sister slipped into drug use. Yeah that was brutal. Very cathartic.
Long after the big baddy was dead, heck even to this day (since the game is STILL going) that character is haunted. At this point my character is Emperor, of an entire world with many adoring counselors and loyal generals. I could spend five motes (basically spell points) and instantly slay someone I look at. I can't go back in time though. And I out lived my sister. THAT was a loss. It didn't end the story, but all the better! So yeah, combat is nerve easily accessible to strike success of failure, it's by no means the only nerve to strike, and certainly not the most effective.
I could give other examples, but just ask yourself about super heroes who tell their families about their idenities and those that don't. The ones that are honest but put their family at risk, ands those that live a lie. That's great storytelling IMO. Win fo lose the fight with the arch nemesis, is my family safe, do they even know me? Those are bigger goals than a fight.